A car that reads your fortune? "You are traveling down I-92. You will meet a tall, dark stranger. He will pull you over for speeding. Thank you.
    -Shelly

...Did I just quote again? FUCK! ...Damn ME.
    -Shelly

The who - stole - my - banana - opera?
    -Shelly

You're trying to break out in cartoon, Chae.
    -Jemma

Maybe the free world doesn't need rocking.
    -Chae

My attempted nose transplant didn't work. Your nose didn't want to take root; instead it took vengeance.
    -Jemma

I'm not a man-hating lesbian, I just get tired of men being like: This is my DICK! TAKE it! and I'm like NO! Just leave me ALONE! and they're like NO! and I'm like Nooo...
    -Shelly

Wow. These are prehistoric ferns. These are ferns that say, Hey - I ate yo' motha!
    -Jemma

If I had thick leather hawk gloves, I MIGHT drag you kicking and screaming from the bed.
    -Bev on protection from the angry Chae

Oh I see, I was mistaking like for like.
    -Shelly, yes exactly

Well it's not MY fault, it's the goddamn cuticles growing in all directions like stalagmites or something!
    -Bev

Ladies and Gentlemen, boys and girls... itchy bra.
    -Shelly

Shelly: I'm at the cottage! There needs to be...
Bev: Poison ivy!

Haveda whosy whatsit.
    -Bev

Jemma: Are those rays of light coming out of your breastbone?
Shelly: No, it's my bra.

I need to attempt to call my stupid, evil, die-witch-die boss.
    -Bev

It's interesting, the positions you're forced to assume in order for the pool noodles to accept you as their rightful master.
    -Jemma

Shelly's now the purveyor of all things noodley.
    -Jemma

Shelly's a noodle pimp.
    -Chae

Ok, guys, no hot noodle sex on the raft.
    -Bev

We don't say grace, we say Glomp.
    -Shelly

Just when you think she's not listening, you quote.
    -Shelly

I don't want to be New Dheli...
    -Shelly

Fish better take me Chrissing.
    -Bev, it's late

There's a difference between humility and just plain silliness.
    -Bev

That's a band name. "Zechs and the tall geese."
    -Shelly

Shelly: We just didn't want you to while you were blowing up drift off to oblivion or anything.
Chae: I could have got back...

Shelly: We're in the country! At night! With NO ADULTS! ...Except that we're all adults.
Chae: Who's an adult? Bev, are you an adult?!
(Attentive blank stare from Bev as she tries to figure out what Chae's talking about.)
Jemma: PPPPFFFBBFFFF!!!!

What, is my brain turkey?!
    -Shelly's brain put the brain-sucking glomp-monster to sleep

I missed that last train to reality, can I catch the 2:10?
    -Shelly

I'm telling you Jemma, we teach you to knit, we sell the scarves, we take over the world!
    -Shelly

Would you - Stop - making me - With the green - meh!
    -Bev in Uno

I put them where they belong and they're lost to me forever.
    -Bev

Amanda: Chris, did you arrest a couch?
Chris: No, it's for you!
Amanda: We don't want a criminal couch!

Chae: What is the sound of one artist talking?
Jemma: I suck.

Show me a small vampire, and I'll show you a DEAD small vampire.
    -Bev's holding a long splinter

Groceries for a week in New Hampshire = $168.00
Floats on Sale at Ames = $10.00 each
Pool Noodles = $1.68
Seeing Chae in the water and flipping off her raft repeatedly = Priceless.
There are some things money can't buy, for everything else there's Limitless Noodles Discorporated.
    -Jemma, Chae, Bev, and Shelly

He's already got the name, all he needs is to lose two more brain cells and we can start watering him.
    -Shelly on Bush

She spontaneously sprouted eyelashes!
    -Chae

That wasn't an accent, that was just Jemma before she was corrupted by the thingyness of Bennington.
    -Bev

I'm confusing myself and my brain hurts.
    -Bev

Bev: You know I didn't break this. This was broken before I touched it.
Shelly: Okay, then give it to me. I'll break it even more.

I'll be a duck. NO, I'll be a tall goose!
    -Shelly

Tonight, The Thing, starring Chae as the Thing. Also Bev, starring as the Other Thing and understudying the Thingy.
    -Bev and Shelly

Ladies and gentlemen, I can't deepthroat celery.
    -Shelly

God, this is Bren. Bren, this is God. Mingle!
    -Shelly

Mama's little baby loves sour fish blood.
    -Jemma, they were sour fish candy

Don't wake up so early, you nut!
    -Jemma

My kingdom for a mouse.
    -Shelly

Bev: Why is there an airhole here?
Jemma: So the leads don't suffocate.
Bev: Yeah, it'd be terrible if they suffocated before you GRIND DOWN their HEADS!

Curse you Ken, a pox upon you and your steakhouse!
    -Bev

If I wanted tonic water I would have said tonic water, now give me some tonic.
    -Shelly

The amazing ectoplasmic ape.
    -Chae

Shelly: And I'm not even tired!
Bev: She says in her encore of delirium!

And I don't even have glasses! I am ... thingy!
    -Shelly

You weren't this grumpy when you were born.
    -Joyce

Behol', Jemma, behol', da works of da quote file. Behold.
    -Shelly

Huge, ugly, make noise, and they leave their skeletons hanging from trees.
    -Bev doesn't like cicadas

Just because I came out of the proverbial closet does not give you permission to bite my ass!
    -Shelly's annoyed with the lesbian mosquitoes

Rise, rise, oh Chae, and get yourself some desert.
    -Shelly

It started out Push the Monkey off the Bed, changed somewhere in the middle to Battle for the Bridge from Star Trek, and then metamorphosized into Wrestlemania 3000, except I was still Spock.
    -Shelly

It's on my list, along with Night of the Dawn of the Day of the Son of the Whore.
    -Bev

They called on Skeeterbane and then they were surprised when she showed up!
    -Jemma

Feeding Chocolate to Monkey is a hobby of mine.
    -Chae

God damn lesbian mosquitoes are getting kinky.
    -Shelly

Chae: You're making assumptions
Shelly: I know, Bad llama!
Chae: Like, Chae's thinking.

They do dumb stuff everywhere, but in the city they call it fashion.
    -Chae

Some of them want to be a fried croissant cause, damn it, it'd be better than this.
    -Jemma

They're not crunchies, they're giant hard hunks of thingy.
    -Shelly

God has an innate interest in my sexuality.
    -Shelly

A new respect for your insanity has just grown within me.
    -Jemma

You must be incredibly muscular underneath all those skin and bones.
    -Bev

Haha! I got out of the quote!
    -Bev

My fuzzy bunnies try to be like that. They'll come out wearing the leather jacket, except its pleather because I'm poor, and they'll have the sunglasses that are two dollars at the 7-11, and they're just standin there like, "I'm not a fuzzy bunny! I'm a hardass bunny, hell, yeah!" Then the normal fuzzy bunny'll come along all unashamed in it's pinkness, and they're all disgusted, like, "Oh get out of it!" And finally they just rip off their jackets, like "Oh, fine! I'm a fuzzy bunny, okay?"
    -Bev

You can't quote me for getting out of the quote! Dammnit, that's illegal!
    -Bev

Incoming, preppy variety... Caucasian.
    -Vinny about hikers

Maybe while he's laughing at me I can kick him in the nads.
    -Vinny about his new spear.

Isis has a fondness for evening wear.
    -Vinny

Shelly: Then we take over the world, that's my life plan, what do you think?
Chae: I've got my fingernails full of dead meat.

The fuzzy bunnies cornered me, merged into one giant fuzzy bunny, and swallowed me. And it rode a Yellow Fuzzy Turtle.
    -Suzanne

It's an odd realization when you look at your friend and realize, "Hey, he beat me up ten years ago."
    -Kevin

You tackled the pole like it owed you money! It was like: A Pole! Yes!
    -Vinny about Kevin

God looks better from this angle.
    -Shelly

Celebration at a 45 degree angle.
    -Vinny

He did a line of sandwich.
    -Kevin

I lost a pickle on that one.
    -Vinny

Suzanne: It's called a RIGHT TURN!
Kevin: Left turn.
Suzanne: Left turn, whatever.

Watch as Fake Smut girl dives into a phone booth, changes clothes with six attractive vampires, and leaves again! All the while maintaining her relative innocence and avoiding rigor mortis!
    -Cassie

I may be a pile of ashes, but dammit, I'm a warm pile of ashes with a TAN!
    -Cassie

Nooo! Fake Smut girl does not quote! She has a quote resistant cape! It's coated with Teflon! Quotes slide off her!
    -Cassie

And Lo, they came within earshot of the Shelly...and lo they doth quote...Quotes the likes of which only heroes tell now.
    -Shelly

See Cassie. Cassie has dyed her hair black. See Cassie washing out the dye. See Cassie's hair turn black. And Cassie's ears. And Cassie's tub. And Cassie's shirt. See Cassie scrub. Scrub, Cassie, scrub!
    -Cassie's Away Message

You just can't lust after a person after they've helped you make soup in front of Snape.
    -Cassie

Shelly: Yay capitalism... or however that's spelled.
Chae: It's spelled w-e-s-t-e-r-n space c-i-v-i-l-i-z-a-t-i-o-n.

You're my dependent this year. You cute, little, fuzzy ball of two thousand dollars.
    -Ted

Shelly: They have this huge hunk of the wall! Now how did they get that?
Ted: Where there's a sailor, there's a way.

Shelly: So you're wireless?
Jim: Clueless.

It's amazing how much I can hurt myself by sitting mostly still.
    -Chae

Magic is a foot so keep your hands to yourself.
    -Dennis

I will kill Gojyo and drink his blood for the nicotine contained therein!
    -Chae as Sanzo

Chae: I could sit here laughing hysterically or I could go to the bathroom.
Shelly: That's another one.
Chae: Goddmanit!

Is my presence a requirement to make your anagram experience worthwhile or do you just want
to beat the shit out of me?
    -Dennis

Shelly: It was a normal subconscieny nightmare.
Jemma: You mean like about socks and radishes?

We gotta have lotsa good description! *pants, drools, blinks, sighs, sweatdrops* Not of that...
    -Jemma

Far be it from me to destroy your wonderfully eccentric quirks and force you into the realm of normality, but you'll save on socks.
    -Shelly thinks Jemma should sweep her room.

I'm so not fit for grand cosmic battles. So I'll just give everyone cake until they decide to like each other.
    -Cassie

No, I'm not a sick little cookie... I'm just a ficcer.... I'm ... a perfectly ordinary sick little ficcer.
    -Jemma

Being chased by an angry burning zombie must really suck
    -Max

I hope I would notice the emotions going down in my stomach.
    -Jemma